The Odd Mom Out

  • 19 July 2017
  • Kristi
When you feel the loneliness of being a Mom of a Special Needs Child and how to feel connected

Do you ever feel like the "odd" Mom out? The one Mom who if you're there in the neighborhood group, great; but if not, no big deal.  The Mom who has to sit out at meetings with your child because they won't cooperate and let you leave their side? The Mom who has to be ready to leave at a moments notice, because of an impending emotional or behavioral situation. The Mom who can't stay out late because her child needs to stay on schedule, or pay the penalty when their child is up at 4am? 

I know I do. 

In all honesty, being a special needs parenting warrior can be a very lonely job. 

My phone doesn't ring very often with other Moms wanting to get together to hang out. My messenger isn't filled with play date requests. I don't have a calendar loaded appointments, family activities, or errands because it causes too much stress on my child. That typically leaves me, here, at home, with my 8 year old. Frankly, she is at an age where she would rather hang out with her friends (when she's in the mood or they are available) or play video games than hang out with me. <sigh>

I get it. You get it. Other Moms get it. Often we are all in the same boat. We're busy surviving the daily demands of being a Mom. We're trying to keep our kids occupied, on schedule, and our homes running. I don't fault you for that and I know you often feel just as lonely. 

So, what's an lonely Mom to do? 

   We all need to feel connected. Needed. Wanted. How much interaction needed for that feeling will vary from Mom to Mom. However, this is what I am doing. 

  1.  Keep ASKING other Moms for girls time, even when they haven't responded the first couple of times.   
  2.  Keep TRYING to have play dates with other families. 
  3.  Look to finding a weekly or bi-weekly HOBBY, class, or workshop to attend to get out of the house. 
  4.  REACH out to existing family & friends I haven't spoke to in a while. Even if all we can do is set up Facebook chat times to connect. 
  5.  Looking for new child care options so I can run errands or have DATE NIGHT out.
  6.  ENGAGE looking for a new Church and church family. 

Will it work? I think so. I believe that no one has to feel alone in this world. We can all find a place where we are accepted for who we are, for what we are, and for our circumstances. In fact, I created a Facebook group just for us Moms of special needs kids. You can join here: Munchkin Mommas

Support Group for Moms of Special Needs Kids

Don't stay the "Odd" Mom out. I don't want you feel lonely. I want you to be happy and thrive. Keep looking for a place to belong. Keep asking. Keep engaging. You ARE important. You ARE needed. You ARE wanted. Promise. 

Tell me in the comments below: Do you ever feel this way? What have you done to find the right amount of connection in your life? 



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